jc92
War Legend
Hustler
LVW: Assistant
Posts: 718
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Post by jc92 on Jan 17, 2006 21:48:24 GMT -5
i heard that one, how about this?
One day a blonde girl comes home from school, and she says "Mom, we're learning about numbers today, and all the others can only count to 6 and i can count to 11, is it because i'm special?" and the mother said "yes dear" The next day the blonde comes back again saying "Mom we're learning about letters today, all the others can only get to d and i can get to g, is it cuz i'm special mommy?" and the mom replied "yes dear" The 3rd day the blonde came home, saying"mom, we learned about the sexual organs, and boobs, how come all the other girls are a flat chested and i'm a double d? is it cuz i'm special mom?" the mother replied "No dear its because your 25!"
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Post by Bartimeaus on Jan 20, 2006 21:45:17 GMT -5
DON'T MAKE ME SCREW YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON! ~ Lastwish Thats the best quote ever.
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jc92
War Legend
Hustler
LVW: Assistant
Posts: 718
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Post by jc92 on Jan 21, 2006 11:59:35 GMT -5
ooooooooooooooooooooook.................
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nuke
Full Soldier
Posts: 49
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Post by nuke on Jan 24, 2006 17:58:09 GMT -5
Top 4 reasons not to be a penis: (I heard this in an e-mail.)
1. You're bald all your life 2.Your neighbors are nuts 3. Everytime you get excited, you throw up and faint. 4. You have a hole in your head.
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Post by Tank_Man on Jan 24, 2006 21:41:02 GMT -5
I saw that too.
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Post by Livewire 1500 on Jan 27, 2006 0:08:03 GMT -5
good one
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Post by Livewire 1500 on Jan 27, 2006 0:14:57 GMT -5
ok i have a good joke here it is ( i heard this in an e-mail)
A magic frog is hopping in the forest and since it is a big forest he has never seen anyone in his life. Soon after he sees a bear chase a rabbit and the frog says stop you are the first people i have ever seen i saw grant you each three wishes. the bear goes first and says i want every bear in this forest except me is a female. The rabbit asks for a biker helmet andthe bear is confused because of the biker helmet. Then the bear says i wish that all the bears in the next forest except me are all females. Then the rabbit asks for a motorcycle and once again the bear is confused. Then finally the bear says i wish every bear except for me will be female. Then the rabbit says for his final wish as he speeds away in his new motorcycle "I wish the bear is gay"
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jc92
War Legend
Hustler
LVW: Assistant
Posts: 718
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Post by jc92 on Jan 28, 2006 21:33:00 GMT -5
i heard the penis joke
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Post by Livewire 1500 on Jan 30, 2006 18:05:54 GMT -5
i got one. I told this one to jc92 already.
Why does michael jackson like k-mart? Because little boys pants are half off.
lol
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jc92
War Legend
Hustler
LVW: Assistant
Posts: 718
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Post by jc92 on Jan 30, 2006 20:58:21 GMT -5
There was this family. They had a cow. This cow was the family lifeline. It was the only thing they used for food and liquids. So, one day the father of the family wakes up to find the cow dead. He loses all hope, and kills himself. The wife then awoke, to find her husband and the cow dead. She as well lost all hope and killed herself. The oldest son awoke. He saw everyone dead. He lost all hope and went down to the river to kill himself. He came to the river to find a mermaid. The mermaid said, "I can restore your family and cow, but you have to fuck me 5 times." and the oldest boy said OK. He only made it to 3. So the mermaid drowned him. The second oldest son awoke, lost all hope, and went down to the river to kill himself. He encountered the same mermaid. He was told the same thing, except he had to do it 10 times. He got close.(7 times!) But it wasn't good enough. So, the mermaid drowned him. The youngest son had awoke. The same thing happened. He went to the river and was confronted by the mermaid, and told the same thing. She said "15 times!" Then the young boy said, "How about 20?!" The mermaid said, "How about 25?!" Then he said, "How about 30?!" and she said, "Fine, 30 it is!" And the boy said, "Wait, how do I know 30 won't kill you like it killed the cow?"
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